If there is one thing we learned during Covid, it was that we need each other, we need people, we need social connection. Loneliness was one of the biggest complaints heard from people who felt lost without hugs, get togethers, and the support that comes from being with someone in person. Now that we have contact back, how do we nourish those relationships and connections? What does it mean to have a social connection?
I had a client once who had a goal to meet a new person each week. She came back and said that this was impossible! I asked her what it meant to “meet” a person. She said it meant to get to know someone well enough to ask them out for coffee or tea. I told her what I had meant was to just greet someone and say hi. She sighed with relief. She thought she could do that. “Meeting” people is making a social connection, it is acknowledging another human being, and being able to make that social contact on a daily basis.
Brain research shows us that positive interactions have a positive impact on our brain chemistry and releases our “feel good” neurochemicals such as dopamine, endorphins and oxytocin (the bonding hormone!). So we are literally giving ourselves a boost of “feel good” when we make a positive social contact. Positive connections have also been shown to keep cognitive skills sharp and to slow cognitive decline.
So to nourish our social connections, start by making a daily positive connection with others. Make a goal to say a sincere hi or thank you to a person you do not know on a daily basis. This spreads positive connections to others and makes you feel good or positive. That cashier who gives you your change? “Thank you! Have a great day!”. The person out walking their dog? “What a beautiful morning!” Coming through a door? Hold the door open for someone !” Here you go! have a great day!” You will be surprised how good you feel and how you are spreading joy to others.
And take time to nourish the people who are there to support you. Let them know you are thinking of them. A quick text can do the trick – “Hey, thinking of you! Have a great day!” or send a cute emoji. Make plans to see your friends for a quick lunch, cup of coffee, or a longer event. While taking time to nourish the positive relationships, the pandemic also allowed for pruning the relationships that were not healthy and did not bring us the support we deserve.
Take care of yourself and this will allow you to spread that caring to others which allows them to feel positive to others and, one person at a time, we change the world!
